Guza's Script For Carly and Courtney For May Sweeps:

Carly: My GOD! I never knew I could love giggling so much!
Courtney: He he he! Same here! I just LOVE to giggle!
Carly: I do think I could giggle all day long.
Courtney: Oh me too! I could giggle all day long.
Carly: Thank goodness I don't have a job or a life, or else he he he, I wouldn't be able to sit here with you and giggle all day long!
Courtney: He he he, oh I agree! For if we had jobs and lives, we would not be able to sit here and giggle all day long.
Carly: Or hold hands!
Courtney: Yes! Or walk arm-in-arm down the sidewalk!
Carly: Phewff, I'm so glad that I have so much time on my hands to giggle!
Courtney: Me, too! Giggling is fun
Carly: Indeed, it is!
 

Carly: You know, Liz *is* in the process of losing her baby, Sonny.
Sonny: Yeah. And?
Carly: And maybe we shouldn't be watching this very devastating, private moment between Liz and Ric.
Sonny: Yeah but if we leave, then I won't be able to see anything. You can see my dilemma, right?
Carly: Forgive me, Master.
Sonny: Yeah, just don't ever let it happen again.

Jason: Ric, I'm going to blow your motherfucking head off.
Courtney (to self): It pains him so to be a hitman.
Jason: In fact, I'm not even going to lay down a plastic tarp. I *want* to see your brains splattered all over your fucking apartment!
Courtney (to self): Oh, the sacrifices he makes for the good of mankind!
Jason: Say your prayers, Ric. On the count of three, you'll be deader than dead.
Courtney: Could I love this man more? The burden he carries would make a lesser man break from the weight.
Jason: You're talking out loud now, you know.
Courtney: Sorry.
 

Maxie: Who are YOU?
Courtney: I'm Courtney, Jason's girlfriend.
Maxie: Why the fuck are YOU visiting me? I don't even know you!
Courtney: Well, Sonny and Jason and Carly are busy, so I'm here to represent the Mob and express our deepest convalescence for what happened to you.
Maxie: That's CONDOLENCES, you dumb ass.
(Long pause)
Courtney: Have I told you that I really like to giggle?
Maxie: Get out of my room.