Skye faces a tough decision
“Massengil” or “Summer’s Eve?”

Scott is charmed by Bobbie!
“Hee hee. Boobies.”

Jacks assures Angel’s safe escape
…now allowing her to safely pull the plug on coma victims throughout the entire world!

Kristina makes a confession about “the wig”
“It was this silly project me and “cousin Oliver” were working on. You see, we were trying to sell blue rabbits....”

Watch for Linda Dano to return in time for Thanksgiving!
Watch for me to eat turkey dinner around 3:00 E.S.T. !

Skye hatches a plan against Sonny
“I’ll make him go to AFGHANISTAN where women are treated like SHIT. And then I’ll make him have to live with women who can’t SPEAK UP for themselves. Yeah, yeah. …Then he’ll have to marry like, oh I don’t know, 3 or 4 wives. Wives who can’t READ, DRIVE, educate themselves, and must live under command from men. Women who get STONED for talking to other men and not being told to GO TO THEIR CAVE when told. And they will have to cover themselves and scurry around the village in his shadow. LOL. He’ll hate it! This is the best plan ever!”

Lucky gets a letter
“Dear Lucky, please don’t worry, this is just baby powder for you to remember me by. Trust me. Take a wiff honey and remember me. Kisses, Liz c/o San Juan Puerto Rico”

Helena offers Luke a challenge
I’ll give you 3-1 odds you can’t suck my dentures out when you kiss me.

Laura and Luke rekindle the past
And reenact the rape scene on the middle of the dance floor at Jake’s Bar

Melissa confession stuns Roy
“I don’t wash my hands before surgery!”

Carly and Lucien bond
“Like oh m’god, are you serious? I thought I was the only one that abused laxatives”

Nick and Gia come together
Lucky shits.

The Qs are interrupted by an unexpected guest
Uncle Airtime

Zander goes to Sonny with advice about Emily
Say. You’re a whore. Have you ever had sex in a wheelchair before?

Tony works on his next miracle cure
A new cure for male PMS to cure Ned’s bitchiness

Scott and Luke fight over Laura
Tony: “I’m not the one that got her stoned with Warhol!!!!
Kin: “Look I’m not going to get into this, you got her addicted!
Tony: “I did NOT! Your thinking of Jackie Zeman!
Kin: “I am NOT thinking of Jackie Zeman, YOU strung her up with heroin I remember it!
Tony: “Oh no I didn’t - - that was Stuart Damon!
Kin: “It was NOT Stuart Damon so don’t put the blame on him - Richard Dean Anderson had her get drunk and walk down naked on Ventura Boulevard…
Tony: “No, no, no, no, Ricky Dean Anderson got made her dance with a lampshade on her head - - JOHN STAMOS had her walk naked.”
Kin: “Ohhhhhh, alright. Huh. Imagine that. Man those were good times”

Jax realizes something surprising
He has no purpose in Port Charles

Sorel’s killer is revealed!
Alan: “It was me. (sniff sniff) I just wanted his morphine drip. Sorry, I was desperate”