10 The unmistakable aroma of Old Spice in the air

9 The gentle hum of a motorcycle in the distance ... helmeted hero approaching anonymously ... suspense building ... tension mounting ... totally predictable and unsurprising climax needed.

8 Liz’s poodle skirt, bobby sox and pom-poms gathering waayyy too much dust lately

Jason: I can't explain any of this to you, Liz, but right now, I really need a place to stay and NOBODY can know about it! Liz: You mean, you want me to lie to Lucky? Jason: Yes. Liz: Okay! :)))

7 Though he mastered the phrase "Want fries with that?", Burton always forgot to suggest to customers that they try McDonald’s new Crispy Lava-Filled Breakfast Turnovers.

6 Well, SOMEONE had to follow Lily Melgar as Yet Another Person From Sonny’s Past We Don’t Give A Shit About Coming Back Into The Show For No Good Reason

5 TPTB confirm that Anna Lee is officially too old and feeble to portray the only self-righteously indignant Quartermaine on the show

4 Wal-Mart isn’t hiring

3 Despite the wig, make-up and what critics called "a perfectly pretty face," audiences STILL didn’t much care for Burton in "The Vagina Monologues"

2 The words "Steve," "Burton," "Pilot," and "Cancelled" uttered in the same breath during recent TV exec meeting.

And the Number One Irrefutable Sign That Jason Morgan/Steve Burton Are Coming Back to Port Charles is ...

Break-in at Smithsonian Institute shows only one missing item: Fonzie’s leather jacket!

"Eyyyyyyyyyy!" >:(